Married couples always wanted to have a happy married life where there’s less problem to worry in their entire marriage. But the reality of life tells otherwise. There are couples who failed to preserve their marriage, ending up filing a divorce. It is actually very hard especially if the family already have children. They might suffer the most and the consequences of their parents’ action. Despite this very hard decision, there is a way at least to make the entire divorce process stress-free for everyone involved.
Suzanne Winchester wrote an article in Divorced Moms some of the most effective stress-reducing divorce tips for couples who are undergoing the grueling process of divorce.
3 Stress Reducing Divorce Tips
Divorce is never pleasant. There are a range of reasons behind divorce, and very rarely are both parties of a marriage open to discuss the legal proceedings that are needed without letting emotions take the wheel.
It can often seem hopeless and you will challenge your sanity at times as well. The good news is that there are things you can do to make the transition from married to divorced slightly less emotional and problematic.
First things first, it is important to know that divorce is pretty common. Here are a few divorce statistics you can draw from when feeling alone during the process:
- 9 percent is the divorce rate per 100 women
- The divorce rate has doubled since the 1960s
- 40 to 50 percent of marriages in the US end in divorce
- 41 percent of first marriages end in divorce
- 60 percent of second marriages end in divorce
- 73 percent of third marriages end in divorce
How can you survive divorce?
Here are 3 stress reducing divorce tips to help keep you sane.
Become An Organizational Machine
There is an endless sea of decisions you will need to make during the course of your divorce proceedings. And none of those decisions are to be taken lightly, since your future, and the future of your children, if you have kids. This makes being an organizational machine an absolute must.
“I have seen time and time again how the most organized spouse often fares better in a divorce settlement,” Jeff Landers of Forbes explained. “Why? Because someone who’s organized has many of the facts, figures and documents ready to hand over to his/her divorce team on Day One.”
Not only will being organized help you make timely decisions and keep the divorce process moving in the direction you want, but it can also help you keep stress minimized and sanity improved. Financial planning is an obvious first step. There are a number of financial issues involved with a divorce.
If possible, begin working through savings, physical property (house and cars), as well as all debts you and your spouse may have, whether shared or not. You will also need to get tax information, pay stubs, bank account statements, investments, and any other financial documentation you can find and neatly organize.
This may seem like a real pain, but once you get it done, it is done. You will be able to access any financial information needed throughout the course of the divorce. This can have a big impact on your long-term sanity. You should also begin thinking about post-divorce finances too.
Get Ahead Of Divorce Costs and Future Finances
You may be knee deep in divorce, but do not let the future evade you. Thinking about your financial future after divorce is absolutely important. This means getting ahead of divorce costs. Begin compiling a list of divorce-related costs to help you understand how much you will owe after divorce, and how much you will need to survive on your own.
What does a divorce lawyer do, and how much do they cost? You can get more information here. Ultimately, if you can get finances organized and work out a plan with your future ex-spouse, you will have an easier road ahead. See full post here…
Whatever the reason is, divorce is and will never be a pleasant experience. Usually, emotions of these couples took over when they start to open and discuss the legal proceedings. It is really welcoming news that there are ways to at least make it stress-free.
This fact is also confirmed by Alan L. Billian is his blog post at Maryland Law Blog about the most awesome tips for a smooth and stress-free divorce. Read the tips below to learn more.
5 Tips for a Smooth and Stress-Free Divorce
Divorce is never a pleasant experience. It is liberating at the end, but the whole process that takes you there can be painful if you are approaching it the wrong way. At Alan L. Billian, P.A., we believe in separating happily—we even wrote a book about it. Our Owings Mills divorce attorneys are happy to share a few tips from our own experiences on how to make your divorce go as smooth and stress-free as possible.
Forgive and Move On
No, it’s not easy, but it’s possible. Remember that you are in control of your future, and it’s up to you to keep holding the grudge or leave the past behind. Mutual collaboration is important in a divorce, and it’s difficult to achieve when one or both of the spouses is filled with anger and resentment. Consider this: if the divorce came as a surprise to you, it’s likely that your spouse has moved on a long time ago. It’s not fair that your wife or husband has kept you in the dark about their true feelings, but there is nothing you can do to change it. If you find within yourself the power to forgive, you will have a much less stressful divorce.
Divorce is often portrayed in media as a fight or a scandal, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Movies and TV shows like drama, so they often depict divorce in a courtroom where lawyers work hard to get their client the biggest chunk of the estate. But in reality, you don’t even have to go through litigation. If you and your spouse agree to work together, you can negotiate the terms of your divorce via mediation, collaborative law or a four-way conference. This is also referred to as “uncontested divorce,” when every matter is settled between the two of you, so no external judgment is needed.
Choose an Attorney You Can Trust
There are many divorce attorneys in Maryland, and it’s crucial to find the one you can trust. If you don’t trust your attorney, you are likely to withhold certain information that could be important. You might think that this embarrassing fact will only hurt your case, but your attorney might be able to turn it into something positive—but only if you tell them first. During your initial consultation with the attorney, you should be able to tell whether you feel comfortable confiding in this person. If you don’t, then look for someone else, because the success of your divorce case largely depends on your honesty and your attorney’s ability to maintain confidentiality. Click here to read the rest of this post…
Making the divorce stress-free for both parties could be instrumental especially when there are children involved for they’ll be able to see that they’re parents had the understanding and respect for each other. However, while these tips will lessen the stress during a divorce, there are also actions that every couple must avoid to ease stress and anxiety.
Divorce process usually takes a long time. Better be emotionally and physically prepared until the court decision is released. Jennifer Paine provided some advice on the things couple must avoid in a divorce in her post at DadsDivorce.
Separation Advice: 5 Things To Avoid In Your Separation
In 2011, the news of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s “love child” glossed over a far more common and problematic issue that you are more likely to face – a trial separation.
When clients come to me for questions regarding legal separation, I tell them a trial separation is a break – from your spouse, from “it all” – to determine whether you are just going through a low point in your marriage or you should divorce.
At first blush, it sounds like a good idea. No one wants to spend money divorcing needlessly, particularly when money is in short supply to begin with.
But, if you are not careful, that separation to help you determine whether to divorce can snowball into the biggest problem in your divorce.
Here are some separation tips for men on what you should not do during your trial separation.
1. Don’t publicize it:
Tell someone you are getting a divorce, and suddenly everyone has something to say. You’ll hear horror stories, preaching, “legal separation advice” (c/o Google), etc., most of them inaccurate or exaggerated.
And that means people are talking about you and your spouse. Like the game “Telephone,” what you say will come back to you contorted, and your spouse will have heard it, too. That often perpetuates a divorce.
So leave your Facebook status alone, skip the public statement and keep to yourselves.
2. Don’t move out:
Move out of your home, and your chances of retaining even equal time with your children or your precious belongings are slim to none. Moving out before the divorce is final is listed by Joe Cordell as the No. 1 stupidest mistake men make when facing divorce.
Those news stories about couples living in separate homes and sharing time with the kids are just that – stories. It rarely happens in real life, and it probably does not happen much in Hollywood life, either.
To a judge, you look like the parent who gave up and the spouse who evidently did not care much about the baseball card collection to take it with you when you left.
Judges rarely care how helpful you thought you would be by letting your wife stay with the kids or how much you intended to return to retrieve your belongings. Your wife, who’s angling to keep the kids and your stuff, will make you out to be nothing more than an abandoner.
3. Don’t maintain the status quo:
You might agree to pay the bills for your wife while you rent a one-bedroom apartment, but you are fitting yourself for disaster if one of you files for divorce later.
For one thing, if she really needs a job, you give her no incentive to get one. Moreover, by continuing to pay the mortgage, the insurance, the utilities, the grocery bill, etc., you are making her case for alimony. You send the message that you can support her, even if you can’t, and are comfortable doing it, even if you aren’t.
The better thing to do is determine, before you separate, who is responsible for what bill, put the bill in that person’s name (if possible), and follow-up to make sure the bill is paid. See full post here…
At the end of the day, the husband and the wife must decide what’s best for the family and for their children if they have any. Divorce is a stressful, grueling and emotional process. There are ways to minimize the stress and emotions at the same time there are things couples must avoid. Couples also had to decide on things such as their house and other conjugal properties.
For a house of a couple undergoing a divorce, the best way to settle it is by selling the property. Dependable Homebuyers help divorced couples sell their house fast. Visit us on https://www.dependablehomebuyers.com/divorce/ to get started.
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